Blowing Away

A few weeks ago a friend of Matt's, who of course I've become friendly with, wrote on my Facebook wall that she wanted to have a girls night with me. At first I thought, okay is there something she needs to talk about? But then I realized that she just wanted us to become friends. I thought, she must be feeling like she doesn't have enough female connections and is reaching out, and that is cool.
So we set a date and met up last night. She said in a G-Chat as we were planning that she was determined to get to know me, and know me she did.
After mentioning a vacation her and her husband have planned to Italy in July and asking if I've ever been, she got to know me very well. I launched in to my story, our story, of the last 3 years of my life, or really the first months after my Dad's death.
I could see her emotion on her face, her searching for something to say and all she could say is, "Wow. You're so strong." Then she said,"And you, you jsut talk about it, you just put it out there." I honestly think that is what blew her away more than my story. People don't talk about death. They don't talk about the things that scare them. I think they need to, I think it is necessary to living a balanced and grounded life.
It makes me want to pick the memoir back up again. I need to keep putting down my story, so others are less scared to tell theirs. It is good to blow people away, and to be blown away every once in a while at how powerful you can be just by speaking your experiences.

Beautiful Life

I try to drink a cup of Slim Life Green Tea every morning. It tastes good, and I like what green tea does for me. I look forward to the little quotes that Yogi Teas put on their tabs at the end of the tea bag.
This morning it read, "The beauty of life is to experience yourself."
Something I've struggled with in the past few years is feeling balanced, grounded and present in the moment. I haven't been experiencing myself, who I am in the everyday. Well, I take that back, because I feel as though over the last 6 months I have been centering myself in who I am and where I am. Being unemployed, and having a lot of time on yours hands, after a major life event helps ground you. I took the time, while looking for a job, to enjoy myself. I took walks in the park, I spent time with friends, I spent time with my new husband. We let ourselves get wrapped up in each other and in who we were and where we were going.
So, back to the present moment. I read the tag this morning and thought, “Yeah, that is the beauty of life.” To know who you are, to be confident and assured in yourself. To let yourself be true to your nature and your nurture.
I will be honest in this exploration and say that in the past month Yoga has helped me become more grounded in myself. I leave a class refreshed and calmed, walking higher and slower. That is good for me, I need that. The part of my nature that dominates is moving fast, and I don't want to move so fast that I'm not experiencing myself and what is beautiful in that.
I know there is a piece of me that is calm, a piece of me that can sit in a moment and take it in piece by piece and savor it and revel in the quietness and enjoyment. I want to balance that with my fast talking, fast walking, get it all done now side. Part of the reason Matt is the perfect husband for me is that he nurtures that piece of me, encourages me, pushes me, helps me slow down.
Right now I feel more grounded in moments than I have in some time, and what amazes me is there are so many things I want, so many more pieces of my life I want to build and put in to place- but I'm not allowing that planning to pull me out of these moments, I'm not living in the future as I used to. I know they will happen, I know I will get there. I also now that life is beautiful, especially when I slow down and experience myself.

Umbrella Etiquette

I "studied" abroad in London. I put that in quotes, because I actually did a work abroad program where I got an internship and had to take one class (I took "Modern Theater and the London Stage which meant getting to see some plays for free!") and then write a paper about my internship/experiences after the program.
Point is, I lived in London from January-April. It rained while I was there.
One of the first things I noticed when walking the London streets during the frequent showers was how efficient people were with their umbrellas. I enjoyed watching the rising and falling tops of umbrellas as their owners navigated the busy streets. I was fascinated by this practice and immediately instituted it. Really, I had to in order to get by walking to and from work, the tube, the pub, you get the point.
Why haven't American's caught on to this? I walk through rainy New York and want to yell at everyone who walks around clueless with their umbrella getting in everyone's way. Just lift it up, you won't get wet, in fact you'll help your fellow New Yorker who is trying to get around you not get wet. Even when I lift mine up, people don't lower theirs a bit to let me get around them more easily, do they not get it?
I guess I shouldn't be that surprised. New Yorkers may be known for moving quickly, but I think that stereotype needs to be corrected. New Yorkers just don't care about what is going on around them. If they want to walk quickly, they will. If they want to stand in the middle of the sidewalk with their dogs wandering out in a radius around them talking on their cell phone, they will. If they want to walk really slowly and weave across the entire sidewalk so that no one can pass them, they will. New Yorkers just don't care.

There should be classes for this stuff.

End rant.

Passover

Passover, as most Jewish holidays, is about food and story telling. We gather family or friends, or friends and family and participate in a Seder. Seder means order. The story is told in a particular order with certain steps to take as you go through it. That doesn't mean you can't skip, you can, and most Reform Jews do, liberally.
On Passover we tell the story of the Jews' exodus from Egypt where they were enslaved. Jewish men used lamb blood to mark the houses of Jews so that when the Angel of Death came to smite each Egyptian's first born (the final plague) those houses would be Passed-Over.

This is the first year I've truly let myself be a part of Passover. Last year there was a family Seder, but I wasn't committed and I didn't keep Passidic (Not eating leavened things to remember how quickly the Jews had to flee Egypt, not allowing their bread to rise)
After my Dad died, I didn't want to celebrate anything, and in the eyes of Judaism I shouldn't have for a full year. So, when Passover came around in the first Spring since my Dad had died, I let it pass me by. I wasn't ready to connect to it again until this year.
At my Mom's Seder we utilized the Haggadah (The book used for the Seder) my Dad had put together many years ago. His Seder was comprimised of this Haggadah (bits and pieces he had taken from other Haggadah's) and the stack of reference materials he'd come to the table with, should any interesting points need to be raised. He loved learning and teaching.
As we sat down on Saturday night I realized how long it had been since I'd let myself fully participate in a Seder. The years before my Dad died I was busy with other things, I went to a couple of family Seder's but the meaning never really sunk in, and at one I was so doped on pain meds from having my Wisdom Teeth out that I was asleep half the time.
I took pleasure in going through the Haggadah my Dad had put together. I thought about how thrilled he'd be that we were using it, that we were discussing points, that all these people who have been in our life for so long were back together again celebrating the Holiday.
At one point we were reading a page and our family friend Mark said, "I have Eric's copy (indeed the front did have Eric written on it) and this page is crossed out." We all laughed, he put in skips! So we skipped!
As we went through the night and I spoke with people I hadn't seen in years about how nice it was to all be back in this capacity again, I realized what I had been missing out on. I'd been avoiding Passover because it was a holiday that meant a lot to my Dad. The history, the sharing of view points, the telling of stories, these were all things he loved so much about Judaism. All things that I'm sure he wants me to enjoy, to carry on, to take part in fully. I realized that these past few years I was being passed over, or maybe I was passing over experiences I should have been a part of. I thought I was passing over the pain, but with all things related to grief you can't pass it over, no matter what you put on your doorpost it is coming for you, sooner or later.
So as continue to avoid the leavened items in my kitchen (If I was Orthodox they would all be thrown out!) I look forward to many Passovers to come, Passovers that I fully participate in, and hopefully many Seder's I will be host with a Haggadah put together in honor of my Dad.

Rambling on a Mac

I'm trying out my Bro's new MacBook so I feel like doing something where I get to use the keyboard a lot because I really like the feel of it. So you lucky readers get a blog post since I don't have any emails to respond to and facebook and twitter are boring me.
I'm sitting at the kitchen table. An Orchid my Mom got when she had surgery the year before my Dad died is blooming again after 3+ years. It is beautiful. 8 or so flowers, white in the center with soft pinks on lining the edges of the flowers.
I talked to a co-worker about loving Orchids today. He spoke about a friend's father that grew them when he was younger and all the different plants he had and what he did to take care of him. I referenced the Orchid Thief and he chuckled. I felt good. I am by no means an expert, but I love the plants and it felt kind of like I was admitted to the club to be able to make a reference to the book that went over well. It makes me want to buy another orchid and not kill it this time. I have a green thumb, but I can't seem to keep them alive. I know it has more to do with my apartment than me and I'm not willing to invest in a heat lamp.
I had a massage today at work (brought in a massage therapist to give massages to employees for $1/minute to help her raise money for team in training) that hurt, in a good way. She really worked out some shit in my shoulders, I feel lighter.
I'm looking forward to going back to Yoga next week, I want to do a couple more beginner classes and then get in to the hot power yoga. yeah!
Ramble ramble- I love this Mac keyboard. Time to sign off though.
Goodnight!

Dogs and Kids

Things I've learned so far dog sitting about how Matt and I will be as parents:

1. I will be the disciplinarian day to day, but Matt will be bad cop and I'll be good cop.
2. Matt will be uptight about things I'll let kids get away with.
3. We'll both be very loving and involved parents, duh I already knew this one.
4. We'll love having fun with our children.
5. Matt will want to have family time in bed, where we all cuddle up and watch a movie
6. We'll completely share the poop duty.
7. I'll probably take over the food duty for the most part.
8. Matt will be the patient one.
9. I'll be the parent who is up front with the faster kid and Matt will be behind with the kid who wants to lag and be slower.
10. We're going to be great!

Focus!

I can't focus. I stare at the screen and can't pick one thing to do. I'm a little jumpy. Maybe it is that I haven't had a good hard workout in a few days, maybe it is feeling like I need a real day off. Who knows. What I do know is that I can't focus.
I have something to work on that I enjoy, that is very HRey and yet I still can't even focus on that! I want to putter around the internets and kill time. I want to go walk around SoHo and spend money I don't have. Actually, I don't want to do that, but in the past I would!
I want something delicious to drink, and something crunchy to munch on. I want to be working closer to him so my commute isn't so long.
I want to not be working at all, or working for myself.
I want it to be Spring and for my ears to not still be thawing after the walk to work.
Yeah, maybe that is what this all comes down to. I'm going stir crazy because my body is ready for it to be Spring, and that weather out there is NOT Spring weather.
I wish I could say I feel better. But I don't. I'm going to go walk around the office with purpose so it looks like I have something to do, but really it is just an excuse to get up from my unfocused desk.

$9 bottle of wine

TGIF.
I've always had good luck on Friday the 13th. Today wasn't one of those days. I think I need to chalk it up to not letting myself just float through the moments, not letting myself sit back and let things unfold. Letting myself feel to much emotion for inconsequential things, letting myself hold on to things too closely and too harshly.
I came home with a $9 bottle of wine from Best Cellars. It was delicious and light and just what I needed. A quick shot to the head of wine. Perfect.
I came home to a husband who always calms me, relaxes me, helps me melt the day away... just with his presence.
I came home and immediately felt better.
I drew in my journal- mostly just lines and symbols. It helped.
I signed up for indeed.com alerts. That helped too.
I may be being reactive, but maybe doing it now is actually proactive. I think my fear stems from someone else being reactive, but better for me to stay out ahead of it, right? Even if it is just nonsense. Sorry to be vague, I just don't want to get in to that stuff here, and it is nothing serious- so don't worry.
I have a cup of tea brewing in front of me. Yogi bedtime calm. It tells me, "By honoring your words, you are honored." So, here I am using my honored words to honor myself.
I will have a lovely and relaxing weekend, that will be honoring myself.
TGIF

In my blood

I'm organizing an in-office blood drive through the NY Blood Center and have been for the last few months. The date kept getting pushed back because other things were popping up. (Funny side note, I was editing reviews for people and someone wrote: "She's great at figuring problems out when the poop up.")
The woman I dealt with was a real piece of work, she defines the saying. She must be great at her job because there was no way I was forgetting about doing this drive. When she finally got me on the phone, I showed great patience(I'm not too proud to admit it) and listened to her and answered her questions and she got me to nail down a date. Seriously, good at her job.
The next step was an in person meeting, something I was not looking forward to. This woman came in as a force. She had a huge bag, charms all over her cell phone and a lot to say.
She continually complimented me, complimented the office (it is not that nice). She seemed like she couldn't get over me, it was kind of funny and flattering too. The meeting was actually really informative and she was a pleasure to meet with.
So this afternoon she calls me, she went on for a bit about what a pleasure it was to meet with me, what a great thing I'm doing and how she's been thinking about me and my personality, how it is just great. It was kind of cute and then I moved on to other things.
As I left the office today, and was taking in how it was still light out, I thought about the phone call again. I like to think of myself as a centered (for the most part) person, someone who cares about other people while still caring for and about themselves. Someone who wants to see the good in people, situations, etc. I'm an optimistic person. I also think because of what I've gone through in my early twenties I am someone who probably has a bit of an older soul than other people my age. So I thought, maybe she saw all this? Maybe she is someone who picks up on people's auras, what they put out in to the world that isn't seen by the naked eye. I can't imagine that just meeting with me once and talking on the phone with me she would pick up and express all that she has, especially since I sent her some curt emails at the beginning.
It made me feel good. I want to know that who I feel I am is put out in to the world without me consciously knowing it, I suppose because that means it truly is who I am. I guess it solidified for me a confidence in what I'm doing and who I've become. Geez, this Blood Drive organizer is really really good at her job.

That Time

I was walking to the train this morning thinking about how I hadn't really written here recently. (I've been keeping up pretty well with my other blogs) I was thinking how I wanted to write a cheesy post about how happy I am. Blissfully so I've been saying.

I was thinking how, I don’t often want to write posts describing my luck in finding a partner who so perfectly complements me, and who so often compliments. But I should write them I convinced myself. And maybe it will help others be inspired to find that in their lives, although I will say it doesn’t always happen and I don’t think it happens often and I consider myself truly among the luckiest who get to find that. Sorry, that's probably uninspiring.

So, obviously I hadn’t written that post yet, I would probably have tonight.

I sat down and looked at this picture. Immediately my mind jumped to a longing, a deep missing of my Dad. We’re so carefree and happy in the picture, despite the crushing loss to the Angels we witnessed that day. I just wanted to sit down and be sad, and of course I wanted to write it out. So there goes the I’m so happy post.

It is that time of year again when the feelings of sadness are stronger, when they come on unexpectedly and linger for longer.

I find myself most of the time living with this kind of foggy knowledge of a piece missing, but my life is full and I’m living well. Then February turns in to March and my head goes back to the time when that foggy knowledge was a strong anxious feeling of an impending loss, and then comes April and I’m back in panic mode and then we reach May and I’m just in a fog of sadness again, I turn foggy.

I know it is coming, and so I prepare for it when I think of it, but I don’t think there is anything I can do except ride with it. The biggest lesson I’ve learning, and it was a hard one to learn, is to just feel. You have to be present to the feeling, you have to let your body and mind succumb to it and it will flow in and then out of you. I promise, it will flow out if you let it. Too many people feel the emotions flow in to them and then shut their body up so it never leaves. It weighs on them, twisting and turning inside. I know. I’ve been there.

The same can be true of good emotions too, feel them, breath them in and let them fill you. The real test is letting them both be inside you at once. I can’t let my blissful happiness and fullness of love leave just because some sadness enters. I don’t have to let it leave. I will be present to them both. Because if my Dad left me one legacy it was how to build a life full of love, love you are proud of and show. He was never afraid of emotions, he once rewound the end of Sleepless in Seattle over and over to watch the end and let himself cry. And boy do I miss getting to tease him about that.

Greener

I was thinking today how for so much of the last 2+ years I've been waiting for the next big thing. I don't think I've really felt settled in a place since the first few years out of college, when life was just about taking this exciting new step and settling in to being a grown up. I had fun, I didn't think too much about the future and for most of my time in Somerville Matt was living nearby.

After my Dad died I concentrated on living in the moment, just being in that second and getting to the next. Then I decided to move to NY and everything was about getting there. Then I got here and everything was about getting a job. Then I got a job and next was getting engaged. We got engaged, then it was about the WEDDING. We got married!!! But we also got unemployed and it was about getting a job, if it hadn't have been about that, it would have been about getting a house. Now we're employed, and staying here for another year, but I don't feel the settled feeling I'd like to feel as a newlywed. I am blissfully happy with my husband, but not with my situation.
I want a house, I want a yard, I want to make a place ours, our first place.
I can't watch the new home shows on HGTV anymore because it makes me too anxious, too uncomfortable, too I want to be there and I can't be for my own good.
The timing isn't right for us, but the problem is it was and then that got screwed up because of losing jobs and a losing economy. It was supposed to be our time, and it isn't anymore and now I can't just sit with it and be happy where I am.
It is like I've been in this head first into the next thing phase for so long that I can't just sit back and be happy and settled. I want so badly to be doing what I'm supposed to be doing next. It is who I am. I am results oriented, I am driven, I go out and get it, which makes me a great employee and business woman, but is not always so great when I have to wait for the right time. The thing is I have patience, for many many things, but not for this.
How do I get back to just being in a moment and letting myself be? How do I just sit back and let things happy the way they will, not the way I want them too? There must be a flip I can switch somewhere, or is it not that easy? I have a feeling it's not.
When I'm sitting in a desk chair I'm usually leaning forward, I just realized that. Leaning in to the words, in to the computer, in to what I'm about to do next even though I haven't finished what is right in front of me.
Things are good right now. I have a husband I adore, who adores me. I have a job in an economy when they are scarce. I have my family and friends who are all healthy and happy. Things are good right now, and I need to start taking that in instead of jumping to a place where I think they might be better.
The grass is greener right below your feet.

You next to me

I have this issue that I am compelled to write about now since I'm presently dealing with it. I can't fall asleep unless Matt is home. And lately, now that we are on similar schedules it is hard for me to fall asleep without him in bed.
I guess it makes sense, when we weren't living together I had trouble falling asleep without talking to him before I went to bed.
I am a very independent woman, I think Matt and I have the appropriate and healthy level of co-dependency. We are married, after all. So, it shouldn't come as a surprise that we want to spend as much time together as possible. Yet, sometimes it troubles me that I have this issue.

Tonight, for example, I intended to go to bed early, and all signs were pointing to this happening. I got in bed at 10:15 with my book and read for about 35 minutes. I felt sleepy so I turned off the light and tucked myself in. Then my mind starts racing, and I start listening for the door. Then I heard something fall and I thought, oh good he's home and he's just knocked something over. So, of course still being awake I got up. And, lo and behold he's not home and something just fell on its own. So now, I'm really up and I know I'm not going to be able to get to sleep without him getting home. It is a mix of the comfort of him being in the bed with me and anxiety at his not being home and thus me not knowing he is safe.

I guess my being troubled comes from the place of it being inconvenient for me, among these other things. I wanted to get up early tomorrow and work out, and now when my alarm goes off at 5:45 it is less likely I will respond to it.

But as I think this through I have to remember how lucky I am to have a man I want next to me, to have someone to worry about and listen for at night, and most importantly who wants to be next to me each and every night for the rest of our lives.
Speaking of which, he just got home. Goodnight!

2009 Visits Home in Polaroids

The Letter K

So a week or so ago brookem over at Skrinkering Hearts had a fun post. She had been assigned the letter S and had to list 10 things she loved that start with S. She offered to provide letters so her readers could do the same and I got a K.
If you want to participate, leave a comment on this post and I will assign you a letter. You then write about 10 things you love that begin with your assigned letter and post them on your blog. When people comment on your posted list, you give them a letter and the chain continues on and on.

So here we go, 10 things I love, or like a lot or just like that begin with the letter K (it is harder than you think!)

1. Kiehl's: I haven't met a Kiehl's product I didn't love. I use their shampoo, their cuticle cream, their lotion, their lip balm and got Matt using their aftershave lotion. If I had more money to throw around, or any money, I would buy more Kiehl's products. For now, I'll stick to just the shampoo and cuticle cream and try to find cheaper options for the rest.

2. Knitting: I don't do it often, but when I do I always enjoy it and find myself feeling less stress and much more calm. I've been working on the same scarf for years, literally, so it really isn't something I do a lot, mostly because I often forget I have knitting I could do.

3. Special K with Red Berries: This is probably one of my favorite cereals. Love those tart dried red berries!

4. Kleenex: I know, this is a weird one. Seriously though, I love kleenex. I'm a big nose blower (which is funny since my Mom claims I didn't know how to blow my nose for a very long time). I have to have a clean and clear nose at all times or I feel weird. I always carry a small pack of kleenex in my purse, and I need a box in the bedroom and the living room.

5. Koalas: The animal I look like is a koala, so I have to like them. They are pretty darn cute, but not as cute as my number 6, and they can be mean little buggers. I kind of like that though.

6. Kittens: I'm a cat person and kittens will get me every time, the cuteness nearly kills me. I thing one of the things I have, am still having, the most difficulty adjusting to is that Matt is really allergic to cats and I'll never be able to have them.

7. Kisses: The Hershey kind and the real kind. Who doesn't love a good kiss? When Matt and I were first together everytime I kissed him I felt a little wave of excitement run through me. That's one of the ways I knew he was the one.

8. Kelly Clarkson: This girl can sing and she knows how to turn out the hits too. Who doesn't love belting out to "Since You've Been Gone"? And her new single, just as good if not better.

9. Kong, Donkey Kong: Probably my favorite Nintendo game. Playing and beating the Super Nintendo Donkey Kong downloaded to the Wii got me through unemployment.

10. Knives: Getting good kitchen knives from our registry was one of the things I was most excited for. It is so nice to have a sharp, good knife to prepare food. Seriously. So nice. In addition, another K from our registry that I love is our Kitchen Aid Mixer!

Well there you have it! That was hard, K is not an easy letter!
Also, tonight I updated all 3 of my blogs! Go me!
Tri Training Blog
Cooking Blog

Personal Day

So I'm in NH today to attend an awards ceremony where my Mom is one of 6 women to receive an Outstanding Business Woman of the Year award, very exciting.
Matt and I drove up last night after work, boy it is a lot easier driving North on a Tuesday night, there was no traffic.
This morning I woke up early to surprise my Mom, it was great.
So today is a personal day for me. Before I left yesterday I told my boss I'd check my email once or twice and she said, "No! Take the day." So I'm taking the day.
I read the paper this morning, well really I read Sunday's comics and did the world jumble. Then I ate some hearty oatmeal and went out for a lovely ski. Pictures and Video to follow tomorrow.
It is a beautiful winter day in NH. While I'm sad I didn't get to enjoy the snow covered City last night, I'm not missing slushing around in the remains today.
I think I'll have a cup of tea and keep enjoying my day.

Cop out, but I love lists!

Well, I don't have a blog really formed to write. I usually have something in my head when I sign in to blogger to post. But I was already logged out of my new email address so I figured it was easier to just log in to Blogger and post something. So, I'll take the easy way out and run off my thoughts list style. I love me some listing!

- I'm thinking more and more about moving this blog to wordpress, things are so much nicer over there, but the hassle of moving the blog would be a lot and I don't know if I can just pick up and leave all these posts behind...I've gone through a lot on this old blogger platform.

- Work is still crazy, although today wasn't as bad, thank God- I really tried hard to not let it be.

- I kicked ass in the 4 mile race I did on Sunday, and I'm so pumped about it because I had a stomach flu last week and didn't work out all week! However, after the race I cooked for a couple of hours, reorganized and cleaned our bedroom for our new dresser and then walked around a bunch and now my legs are tired!

- Speaking of our new dresser, I'm so pumped about it. We got this one from Ikea (splurged for the real wood!) and I'm so happy with it, it is so much more space, like I can't believe how much more space and the really great thing is I don't even want to go buy more clothes to fill the space, and I actually am getting rid of multiple pairs of shoes. It feels so good! (Truthfully for me getting rid of things always feels good, it is just that I usually quickly replace the things with new items). In addition, I went to Anthropologie today and bought new knobs for the dresser that were a steal on sale and look great, much better than the handles it came with. It really is making me feel better and better about staying here another year.

- I can't believe how warm it was these past two days, it makes me yearn so much for Spring. Tease.

- I just found out a friend is pregnant with her 3 child and I'm so darn excited for her, and for myself to get to watch her go through the pregnancy and then get to experience, for the 2nd time, watching her raise him or her. It has been such a pleasure getting to see it happen with her youngest.

Okay, that's about it for now. I have a post forming of my 10 favorite things that begin with K- thanks to Brooke S at Shrinkering Hearts so be on the look out!

Whack Job

This week has been crazy, crazy, crazy. So many things going on at work all of a sudden. I went through my days with Matt as we ran the East Side Drive of Central Park this evening, yay for warmish winter evenings. When I finally finished at about mile 1.8 I asked what he thought. I think some of his huffing and puffing was thinking about all I had done today. He agreed that it is crazy the amount of stuff I have to do in a day, and not just that but do at once.
I was on a training call for 1.5 hours today with the line muted. This meant I could be returning emails, answering employee questions as they popped in and answering my temps questions as she did things for me. And, it wasn't that I was ignoring the training to get this done, I took the training in completely and actually am excited to get to utilize what I learned.
It is like I'm a professional mini fire fighter, or maybe more like a professional whack a mole player, not like your basic every day Joe or Jane who gets the high score at the arcade, I mean pro level, tournament winning, money making, endorsement grabbing whack a moler.
Whacking moles, left and right, hitting them before they even think to pop up. It is true, I try to be very proactive in my work.
In any event- so that's what I do everyday. And just for kicks- here's a couple of pictures Libby snapped at one of our pre-wedding festivities this summer of me playing a came similar to Whack a Mole- just for the sack of furthering the metaphor.

Quiet

It was quiet in the house the evening. I stood on the heating grate and let the warm air fill up the legs of my pants.
I looked around the darkening kitchen and almost said out loud, "You would have liked this, the house being so quiet."

Belly Aches and Groans

I just put on a big cozy sweatshirt. I love that feeling. You put it over your head and instantly you are warmer, more comfortable, even happier.
I'm feeling off. This morning my stomach was a mess, I ate some oatmeal and felt a little better.
Then my face started burning up, I was getting flush over and over again. If I had had a thermometer I would have taken my temperature.
I left at lunch time and came home to a warm bed with Matt already in it, his stomach feeling off too. But there was more, is that a cold I feel coming?
It is like old times, we decided, us being home together during a work day.
I stirred an hour in, at 3:30ish (I'm guessing) and the sky was still light, so I decided I could sleep for longer, finally getting up at 5:00. If I can fall asleep easily tonight we'll know that my body really is fighting something.
My stomach still feels off, and I'm trying to kick a head cold out with airborne and it tastes disgusting which doesn't help my stomach.
I'm boiling water for pasta, my cure when my belly aches.
I'll make some tea and then feel really cozy.
The Winter aches and pains. It really does feel like Winter out there now.

Wedding Mosaic

Wedding Mosiac, originally uploaded by adkcub.

I never get sick of looking at these, and since I haven't shared the professional final pics- here we go- a sampling!